The Art of Seduction

“I will seduce you, how do you feel about that?” I would have to say, I would feel pretty damn good, knowing that somebody wanted me that badly and felt confident or possibly arrogant enough to express it.

So I started thinking, how do you seduce people? Is it something inherent, a skill that you are born with and can call upon as and when required? Is there an equivalency in terms of charm school, a place that you can go to learn seduction techniques? Do you develop the ability to seduce with age and maturity …. I have to admit I am lost on this one!

For a man, I have to admit that I have observed over the years many attempts by men to seduce women; I guess they would class it as ‘chatting them up’. Thankfully the methodology seems to have changed with time. One-liners such as: ‘your knickers would look good on my floor’ have long since been superseded by the confidence of a man to actually walk over to a woman by himself, without the aid of a mate and actually engage in some form of conversation.

For a woman, how do you seduce a man? I know what we’re thinking; it doesn’t take a lot …. Cold beer, talking about football, feeding them and also getting naked seem to work pretty well. I think however that over the course of evolution, the art of seduction is getting harder and this is where techniques have changed.

Excuse the pun but one size does not fit all anymore, you have to tailor the technique depending on who you are trying to seduce, it is almost like some niche marketing technique.

Some rules remain the same, you go out you’re wearing your pulling pants, you smell good, you have the security of your mates and mentally you feel invincible. But then, you get to the place, wine bar, pub, club, party and it all starts to fall apart. Yes there are men or women there, they look good, they smell divine, and you have established eye contact but then what? You know what happens in the majority of cases, even if you do see somebody you like it then turns into a game of cat and mouse. You look, they either pretend they haven’t noticed they might look at you momentarily and then, then what happens …. they look away and this ritual could go on all night. Why you might ask yourself, because women like playing hard to get and like being chased and men see it as a novelty initially and then have no staying power. So what do they do, they go off and find solace in a cold beer or even worse the arms or legs of a warm woman.

So why do women play this game is the million dollar question? We want to be seduced, so why put up barriers; send out the wrong signals that we’re not interested and put men through this initiation. I guess the simple answer is, because we can!

Have I ever been seduced, I have my memories, my first interlude sitting on a road sign for ‘Salter Avenue’ when I was 15 in my school uniform holding hands and pretending to be not particularly interested, playing it ‘cool’ with this boy, who inevitably ended up being my husband.

The only advice I can give to men is please do not give up on us, we really truly do want to be seduced, and we want nothing more sometimes …. But it is all about getting the recipe right a large scoop of spontaneity, heaps of humour (women always like men that make them laugh), drops of charm, sprinkled with sincerity and of course romantic gestures. I have missed out slices of animal magnetism but then without that initial spark whatever it is, it ain’t gonna happen.

So how do you seduce somebody that you really really like, whether lust or love at first sight or a feeling that has developed over time that can no longer be confined?

Well, women are attracted to men that stimulate their senses. You have to smell out of this world, look presentable, come across as being interested and interesting at the same time and also be assertive and in control but emotive as well – good luck!

What are men attracted to, I have to say, I don’t know anymore, is it looks, intelligence, the fact that you have been noticed and acknowledged – the cliché of nice eyes. I really don’t know, and would be indebted to any man that would care to enlighten me.

I am guessing that for people dating the same sex it is easier, because you already have an insight into what the barriers and challenges are and can pre-empt situations, maybe I am wrong! If only life could be that easy.

So I really am intrigued, for the future and longevity of seduction what do you do and how do you get the person that you really want?

….And just for future reference, if you want to show some spontaneity and come pick me up in a Morgan, have Double Captain of my Heart playing, smell of Hugo Boss or Armani, wearing jeans a shirt unbuttoned just a little with a jacket, drive to some torch lit deserted beach where a table is set out surrounded by candles – I can guarantee that I would be well and truly seduced!

Using the words of Bitter Sweet: Drink Me Sober!

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About Sharon Yull

Sharon Yull is an academic, researcher, business consultant and published author of over twenty business and computing books and publications.She is qualified with a BSc, MSc, HND in Business and Finance, PGCE, Fellow of the Institute for Learning and also an Associate of the Assessors Institute. Sharon enjoys reading, swimming, outdoor pursuits, theatre, music and travelling. She is an inherent romantic always there to offer support, guidance and a shoulder to cry or laugh on.
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