Tag Archives: marriage

With yet another marriage under her belt, Katie Price proves to us that she is a woman with little or no morals when it comes to getting married.  Marrying former stripper Kieran Hayler after only 2 months of knowing him is proving to be the norm for ‘The Pricey’.  Nothing pricey about marrying someone after 8 weeks of knowing them.  With Alex Reid married and divorced in under a year and Peter Andre under her belt, if I was Kieran I would be worried this may not be the true love story he is after.  She is the modern day Joan Collins except cheaper, tackier and cheaper again.

Katie is just another celebrity in a long line of celebs who decide that marrying and divorcing in under a year is suddenly the thing to do.  She’s not the only one who is at it, let’s all take a little look at the ridiculous life of Kim Kardashian and her 72 day marriage to Kris Humphries.  We were led to believe that he was her true soul mate and the KKK Klan was going to spout wings in the shape of teeny tiny Kids.  Instead, after spending an eye watering £13 million pounds on her wedding she still decides that throwing in the towel after 72 days is completely justified.  Go Kim.

These ridiculous pointless celebrities can almost justify their actions as they have an abundance of cash and can throw it at as many weddings and divorces as they see fit.  Reason being is that they do not have to save like us mere mortals.  We all hope that we only get married once in our lifetimes, partly because we can’t fork out for it second, third and fourth time around!  It seems to becoming a bit of a trend at the moment.  I can see more and more of my girlfriends getting hitched or at the very least getting engaged in under a year.  Has this become the norm within my social clique?  No longer do these women want to wait for a few years to be sure that these guys are defiantly the one.  It’s a proposal in under a year otherwise they are pushing for one.  I have been with my boyfriend for coming up to 5 years and although I can safely say marriage does cross my mind, it’s not the only thing on my mind.  I’d love a huge rock and a great big pudding dress and have everyone look at me for the day but quite frankly I have better things I would rather spend my money on (like Jimmy Choos).

Lots of people I know ask me why me and my boyfriend aren’t married or at least engaged yet; clearly being 30 odd is no spring chicken anymore and if I don’t marry now then I’ve missed the wedding boat apparently!  I am perplexed with questions like ‘Don’t you want to get married then?’ when sat with other married couples.  As if not becoming one with my partner is not good enough for some people.  I would like to remind these married couples that the statistics of first marriages are that 50% of them end in divorce first time round.  That figure goes up to 66% second time round, and if you think that third time is a charm, I’m afraid that 75% of you are heading for the divorce courts.

I’m all for marriage and it should be a joyous occasion for everyone involved.  A time to show the world how much you love each other, not something to be had after a few months of dating because you feel like it (Jordan), or because you think this is what you should be doing.  Take your time ladies make him work for it.  Everyone knows the honeymoon period wears off after a year anyway; just don’t let that last longer than your marriage.

When you struggle with your partner, you are struggling with yourself. Every fault you see in them touches a denied weakness in yourself. (Deepak Chopra)

The start of a new year always brings about reflection, new ambitions and inspired action to achieve more. As a result, most will initiate diet’s, insist on physical check –up’s and tend to the maintenance of material goods. However, just as your Peugeot or Mazda is significantly easier to start, than to maintain, a lot of us tend to overlook the regular MOT that a long term relationship requires to guarantee longevity. To ensure that you won’t have to mask personality clashes or boredom as ‘irreconcilable differences’ down the line, here are some common ‘bad habits’ that may plague a flourishing relationship if not tended to.

Replace that Dressing Gown and Slippers with Some High Heels

He has seen you in the morning in your natural state, encouraged you to push during childbirth and tended to your every whim when you had flu; it is human nature to be comfortable in his presence. However, whilst familiarity can enhance your intimate connection, it can also encourage self-neglect, insecurity and loneliness. Sadly, these symptoms, (if neglected), can lead to diminished sexual attraction, impertinence, infidelity and contempt. The only way to combat this is to make that effort to devote time to each other, (and not just at the breakfast table over a coffee and paper).

Spontaneity is key and people revel in positive attention and reassurance. So whether it is a surprise text or a ‘date night,’ let them know that you value the intimate moments you share. Ditch that teddy bear gown and spice things up with something more alluring from Ann Summers. Strengthen that bond by suggesting an exhilarating activity (like a charity sky dive), or perhaps a day out devoted to something he has a passion for. Focus on your potential journey together, spicing it up with acts of pleasurable entertainment and impulsive affection!

Why Don’t We Talk Anymore?

Women hold talk groups, authors produce books and the media is infiltrated with programmes packed with advice on how to overcome this problem. Whilst it is common knowledge that communication is one of the fundamental pillars to a successful relationship, it still remains a weakness in so many partnerships. We all have the ability to talk, but the problem seems to remain in how we use it. Open displays of affection on social networks may be cute, but they can also disguise fundamental issues and difficulties. In the same way, sarcasm and raised intonations can negate ones good intention if overridden by rage.

Whilst that sense of humour might get you through the hard times, it is just as important to allocate time to discuss mutual issues. Talking is just another means of engaging that other person and giving them attention. Compliments can bring a smile, but showing an interest in your partner’s day and verbally appreciating the little things, can have a greater effect.

Priority Changes

Whether it was a new job, move of residence or the birth of a beautiful baby, we are all subjected to change. For most, it is viewed positively as a sign of growth, progression and happiness, but it can also lead to power struggles, jealously and the slow deterioration of solid foundations. Celebrity couples such as Kiefer Sutherland and Siobhan Bonnouvier have ‘blamed transition’ for their breakup, whilst the birth of a baby at a young age was listed as an added pressure to the relationship of Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson.

There is clearly a significant difference in change for the individual, as opposed to a couple. Whilst we all expect consistent progression from the first date to the proposal, we still have difficulty adapting and accepting differences when having to face challenges alongside others. Team work and really knowing your partner is important. Change brings expansion, but similar to a computer game; once you enter another stage, it is inevitable that you will encounter new and unexpected obstacles. Don’t give up, learn from your mistakes and tackle those obstacles together!

Please Can I Have Some More?

We all know what we ultimately want in life and at a young age we are told to have high aspirations and dreams of owning ridiculously expensive material goods. However, as we grow, our expectations seem to remain unrealistic.

Not content, we venture outside the box to view the relationships of others and begin that self destructive journey of wishing for more. However, just as items you buy have warnings and directions; ‘Beware of the Teaser and be realistic!’ Your rose tinted view of happiness may just be yet another facade leading to a road of resentment, infidelity and melancholy, because ultimately every relationship will be tested. The partnerships that exude longevity and strength are not the ones filled with sexual escapades and spontaneous jaunts, but the ones that have overcome difficulties and have grown together because of them.

Forgetting the Reasons Why You Fell in Love

The discarded socks and position of the toilet seat may now be a pet peeve, but how can you compare that to the heart warming smile and charismatic personality that you first fell in love with? As time elapses, certain quirks that initially attracted you, can turn to slight irritations once you get to know your other half. It is natural for boredom to set in after years of being with one person, but couples such as Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell, as well as the notorious Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are testaments to the fact that it is possible to overcome and conquer. No one has the secret to a successful marriage, (as it is clear that one size does not necessarily fit all), but it is obvious that continuous nurturing, support and adaption are imperative to encourage growth together. Love and trust may be pillars, but constructively enjoying each other’s presence is what will keep them standing.

Let’s face it, most long term relationships take a completely different guise once the honeymoon period is over. Whilst the position you advertised for may have been filled, your journey together is now crammed with unexpected events and changing priorities that may challenge the foundations to the idyllic life you imagined. Don’t fall at the negativity post and accept that red card, because these are just common mistakes that can be rectified with spontaneity, endurance and a little bit of creativity.

Your family and your love must be cultivated like a garden. Time, effort, and imagination must be summoned constantly to keep any relationship flourishing and growing. (Jim Rohn)

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