Tag Archives: dating

Dating Etiquette – Keeping Your Man

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London Life Coach & Relationship Expert Sloan Sheridan-Williams talks about dating etiquette. Follow Sloan Life Coach on Twitter @SloanSW_London and check out Sloan’s website www.sloansw.com

Now you have got your man, the next important step is to keep him which means traversing the potential minefields such as meeting his friends, going on your first mini-break, meeting the parents and behaviour in public.

Meeting His Friends

Although many of us are delighted to reach the stage where our man wants to show us off to his friends, once the euphoria has worn off we realise that the first meeting is akin to being thrown into shark-infested water – worse still – without a life jacket! This is an important time for you as while being flattered you can also use this time to scope out your new beau and judge him by the company that he keeps. The first thing to remember is that males are generally guarded with their pack so any invitation shows that you’ve already made it to the next stage.

If his group is mainly male your chat will require slight adaptation minimising all talk of girlie pinks and purples and leaving feelings and emotions at home. Men in general when they are not fire gazing and communicating with a series of grunts tend to banter in an effort to display their wits and their ego. If you try to compete on their level, your one-liners will seem slightly ambitious therefore it is important to be yourself along with a charming smile and a demeanour that you’re easy to be with.

The best tactic is to remain your beau’s shadow every now and again disarming his friends with an indirect complement. They are unlikely to be used to this and they will begin to start a rapport with you.

Remember his friends are not as interested in you as your girlfriends would be in him. Men are far more direct and their humour may even make you the butt of their jokes. The best way to navigate this situation is to not over-think it, respond always in humour and take nothing personally. In addition when meeting his friends, spend more time mingling with them than hanging off his arm like a lost puppy dog. If there is a female friend in his group, suppress any territorial urges you may have and whatever you do don’t compare yourself to her or criticise her to him. The female friend appears to wield much power so often people advise to get them on side, however the best tactic is to treat them like one of the boys and genuinely not notice their gender or let them influence your behaviour thus keeping the power at all times.

Men often criticise and jest their friends, do not be drawn into this trap by joining in with the banter, as the outsider it is possible to cause offence even if you are only agreeing with what others say.

Make sure you meet his friends before he meets yours. It is imperative that you have confidence in your relationship and that there are no cracks that niggle as your girlfriends will pick up on these as quick as a duck takes to water.

As for where and when, if possible choose to meet for drinks as this is less pressured than dinner.

The Mini-Break

Once you’ve made it past meeting the friends it won’t be long before he pops the question – not the proposal – but “do you want to go away for the weekend?”.

Just like the Scouts motto “Be Prepared”, the mini-break is a test drive to whether you can spend 24/7 together in close proximity so it is important to be fully organised enabling you to look good at all times. The trick here is to travel light as you are only equipped with one weekend bag so some location research and weather checks are the order of the day. Make sure you implement an underwear and grooming session before your weekend away and pack a book or local guide-book so you busy yourself up for when and if as most men do he needs some space.

It is traditional for the men to choose the destination of the mini-break and take control. If you are expecting Cannes but end up getting Brighton remember that it is only polite to express the same amount of excitement and enthusiasm as your beau will have put careful thought into your mini-break. Although as in the first part of this series we explain that etiquette dictates that you are not a girl who is easy to get, once you’ve got your man you should now become a woman who is easy to be around. Wherever you go, take in the local culture, restaurants and nightlife and be sure to supply many indirect compliments to his choice of venue and attractions. It is during this period that the focus is entirely on the two of you and rather than falling into the trap of being the perfect housewife and making your man happy, this is an important time to ask yourself whether you enjoy his company, whether he makes you happy, and whether you have just gift wrapped this relationship or is it the real thing.

As for money, in this modern day and age people find it acceptable to go Dutch. Etiquette still dictates that the person who invited the other on a mini-break should pay however as the guest it is only polite to offer to pay for a round of drinks here and there, a pub lunch and maybe a cab ride or two back to the hotel. If you are unequally matched financially then it is perfectly acceptable to have a conversation about who will pay for what before you embark on the trip.

Most importantly keep the mini-break light, fluffy and full of laughter and although little niggles may crop up along the way it is important to ask yourself if it is important to be right or enjoy your holiday.

Meeting the Parents

This part of the relationship can be the biggest minefield of them all so much so that there is a comedy along the same lines starring Ben Stiller, Robert De Niro and Teri Polo. No doubt your encounter will not be as hair-raising as displayed in this film but to guide you on your way ask your other half for a little information about his parents in advance. Typical questions to ask would include:

  • Are they strict or relaxed?
  • What dress code is expected?
  • Will dinner be cosy in the family room or a more formal dining affair for 20 people?
  • What topics of conversation should be avoided at all costs?
  • What individual subjects are each member of the family interested in?

As for dress code, conservative and elegant wins every time, make sure you are comfortable and ready for any occasion packing both a smart and casual outfit if you are staying over.

On greeting the parents it is important to use their title and surname until they invite you to use their first name. It is also the order of the day to take a present – a decent bottle of wine or a plant is acceptable however the more original and personal you can make the gift the better. If the family includes a grandparent or a sibling, it is also good practice to take a token present for them as well.

There is a fine balance between acting like one of the family by mucking in and stepping on the toes of your boyfriend’s mother. Therefore offer to help with domestic chores but defer to the mother, showing that you know your place and that she is ruler of the domestic household. As your boyfriend may be very relaxed at his parent’s home remember that when following his lead you should always increase the formality by a couple of notches, i.e. just because he drinks a few glasses of wine at dinner doesn’t mean that you should.

Over lunch or dinner, do not be a wallflower and enjoy an interesting debate with reasoning but avoid controversy at all costs. During such debate never complain about the injustices of your life or wax lyrical about those less privileged going through hardships in Third World countries. Likewise do not throw out gushing compliments towards the family as it will appear creepy and insincere.

If the parents house is big enough to accommodate you sleeping in different rooms, although it is common knowledge that you have spent at least a night together before meeting the parents, the accepted protocol is to ask for separate rooms.

On leaving thank each member of the family in turn for a wonderful stay and follow it up with a thank you letter within five days of your visit making sure you mention every member of the family present in your thank you note.

Again make sure you have met his parents before introducing him to yours, and when such time comes make sure you prep him with family oddities and off-limits behaviour so that he too can make a good impression with your parents.

Well done on getting this far in coupledom, however remember that it is easy to lose friends and alienate people by giving up much of your previous life and relying on your boyfriend. Make sure to strike an even balance of maintaining your respective lives, not taking each other for granted, restraining from public displays of affection and respecting each others privacy. At this stage above all trust and honesty is the most important part.

Good luck with your relationship. If you have any further questions or comments please leave them below.

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Dating Etiquette – Getting Your Man

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London Life Coach & Relationship Expert Sloan Sheridan-Williams talks about finding Mr Right. Follow Sloan Life Coach on Twitter @SloanSW_London and visit www.sloansw.com

In this day and age, dating is often referred to as romantic roulette. It is a careful balancing game of either acting demure yet approachable so that the old-fashioned man can ride in on his metaphorical white horse sweeping the girl off her feet or instead taking charge of the situation living my the philosophy of “she who dares wins” and making the moves herself.

The dating game is not easy however the best outcomes normally occur when you work through the unspoken dating etiquette rules to attract your desired object of affection’s attention.

The first thing to note is that the impulsive female can send most decent boys running scared leaving only the men who want to rack you up as a notch on their bedpost so subtlety is the name of the game; a flirtatious glance, a subtle approach and the exchange of business cards puts the ball firmly in the boy’s court to phone you. Waiting might be hard but even in this day and age calling the guy first is a big no-no.

The best way to become noticed is to choose your company carefully. Preferably downsize the group to just two or three people. Master the art of looking popular yet relaxed, catch the eye of the gentleman you wish to pursue and hold his gaze and smile sweetly. In a perfect world, the guy should approach you but in the modern world so many females approach men that they have become lazy.

If you feel able to approach him directly, strike up a natural conversation and avoid chat up lines at all costs. Keep the conversation short and sweet, make an excuse to leave and if they have not asked for your number then it is perfectly acceptable to say “I’m sorry I have to go and join my friends now. It’ll be fun to meet up some time. Would you like to swap numbers?”. If he takes your number and does not call, chalk this up to experience and move on. If however he gives you his number yet doesn’t take yours, call once leaving a message and leave the rest up to him.

If this goes swimmingly then you should by now have discussed your first date. The correct etiquette is that whoever asked for the date takes care of the booking, the venue, the time and the dress code.

More often than not the man will choose dinner and drinks so make sure you dress appropriately for the restaurant chosen. No matter how fancy the restaurant, power hair-dos and bold make-up are not the order of the day. A girl next door natural look is more appropriate and enchanting. As for dress code, go for elegant and sophisticated showing minimal skin but use textures such as silk or chiffon to bring out your best qualities. Remember to focus on the upper half of your body including accessorising as this will be on display more than the rest of you.

Being five minutes late is acceptable but any more looks pretty arrogant. On arrival, the gentleman should already be there and to lighten the mood go straight in breaking the ice with a peck on the cheek.

Once you are seated and have ordered, keep your conversation nice and fluffy. Avoid talking about marriage, children, work difficulties and the like remembering at all times that he is your date and not your therapist. A successful date will include engaging conversation on art, culture, life and hobbies. Remember men like to advertise their success as a form of status, even if you are a career woman resist the urge to reply in kind again keeping the conversation light. If the conversation feels stilted, use this time to ask the man questions that you know you have in common, do not be put off if he doesn’t return the questions just use this opportunity to give your own point-of-view to avoid the conversation becoming too one-sided.

If you are not interested in your date then going Dutch is the universal sign to keep things in the friends zone. If however you are interested in a second date, the correct etiquette is for the invited to pay the bill. During this moment set up a silent smiling eye look with a genuine thank you followed up by an additional thank you by text or e-mail the next day.

For those of you playing it cool, you should end your first date there however in this modern day and age many dates end up in the one night stand. If you like the guy, etiquette dictates that no matter how attracted you are to him you should at least hold out until the third date. However as a consenting adult if you choose to go back to his place or vice versa, do be prepared that this may be interpreted as a no strings attached encounter.

If a one night stand is what you’ve decided to do, remember that any dark alley gropery is not lady-like and also don’t force taxi drivers to endure any indiscretions. Once home remember it’s never too late to change your mind but if you don’t then reduce your expectations for a long term prospect although never say never.

After the act, it is polite to get to know your conquest under the guise of shedding a little more meaning and memorability to the encounter however if this is obviously not appropriate then steal yourself away, make your excuses, depart with a good reason and hold your head up high as you leave. If he has come back to yours, the polite thing to do is offer him breakfast however, if he declines, let him do the chasing and consider that an end to the encounter.

If however you have made it passed the third date and it is inevitable that both of you wish to take the budding relationship to the next level it is perfectly acceptable after the third date to act on your feelings. Make sure you look amazing for the date, apply some scent to your pulse points and ensure your underwear is stylish and sophisticated. In these modern times it is perfectly acceptable to pack a toothbrush, clean underwear and condoms in your handbag.

Prior to having sex, etiquette dictates that communication is paramount and this means that you should feel free enough to speak about contraception, sexual health, sexual preferences and your feelings.

Remember at all times that it is perfectly acceptable to have a change of heart but if this is not the case keep up the humour quotient and expect that any first time sexual relationship may be clumsy and/or mind-blowing, so manage your expectations.

Also ensure that if you do share your house with a flatmate that you remember that discretion is important. Having already built rapport with your potential boyfriend, any need to do a mad dash in the morning should not be present in either of you however good or bad the previous night went. It is a crucial part of the dating process to spend the first morning after together even if either of you are slightly out of your comfort zones. This can be as simple as relaxing over breakfast and the morning papers or going out to grab an early brunch. Some couples prefer to spend the whole day together however it is also acceptable to manufacture a prior engagement to give yourself some space to decide what you really want. The overall messgae here is to be good company, avoid being clingy and definitely do not overstay your welcome. It is common practice for the man to chase the next day and at all costs do not be the first to contact once you’ve left.

Obviously there are many variations of the above model but the take home message is to be easy to be with, fun to talk to, to choose when you’re ready to have sex unrelated to peer pressure and don’t chase the guy.

If you have any further questions, do not hesitate to send them to us through the Questions & Answers page and have at http://datingreviewer.org/victoriabrides-review/

 

Happy dating!

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Dating in the Workplace – Recipe for Disaster?

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London Life Coach & Relationship Expert Sloan Sheridan-Williams talks about workplace dating. Follow Sloan on Twitter @SloanSW_London and check out Sloan’s website www.sloansw.com

Dating at work is definitely becoming more commonplace but just because everyone else is doing it, does that mean you should too? If that was the case then I’d dye my hair the new trendy shade of orange in the style of Pixie Geldof and watch as my clients flocked anywhere but my therapy couch!

Dating is a form of interaction - in the olden days more a courtship. With the hours of workers increasing and the recession playing its part in the reduction in socialising, is it any wonder we are looking to find love over the photocopier?

The muddy waters tend to appear if you work in very close proximity or the hierarchy of either of your positions has an effect on your working life.

I am not saying you cannot meet the perfect person for you at work, but just before you jump in with both feet, perhaps ask yourself:

1. Is this just a natural progression as we spend so much time together and we would like to get to know each other on a romantic level?

2. Would I still have chosen to date my current object of affection if I managed my time better, accepted a few more invitations out with my friends and opened myself up to meeting new people?

If your answer to the first question was yes, perhaps take the leap but don’t forget your safety net. If you answered yes to the second, run while you still can – you deserve better.

First Conversations – Does He Like Me?

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London Life Coach & Relationship Expert Sloan Sheridan-Williams talks about dating, body language and finding Mr Right. Follow Sloan on Twitter @SloanSW_London and check out Sloan’s website www.sloansw.com

I am often asked by my clients – “When meeting my potential partner for the first time, how do I know if he likes me or is the one?”.

The cliché answer given by most happily married couples is that you just know, but amongst the butterflies and the panic of what to say next, we can often miss the most obvious of signals. Below is a checklist of what to look out for to know whether it is worth moving on to a second date.

Face/Head:

We have no doubt all been trapped in those conversations where the other person is waxing lyrical about what they think is a seemingly fascinating topic but it feels like watching paint dry to us. The key to checking if you are that person with the object of your affection (OyA) is as simple as watching whether his/her face drops or lights up as you are talking. The trick to keeping them interested is to continue on with the topics that make them more facially engaged in your conversation. You can then ask them questions, opening up their involvement. Make sure you steer away from any conversations that make them disengage or worse still turn their head when the slightest noise happens in attempt to the survey the room for their escape. Such an obvious signal is a clear indication to change the subject immediately.

Body:

It is easy to spot a potential new couple that is hitting it off as their body language becomes close or mirrored. However, when in the conversation with the OyA we often miss smaller cues. If his/her body is turning away or worse still they physically take a step back, this is a sign that you have lost their interest. This could be momentary – do not fret, there is one last attempt to save such a situation. Divert all the attention back on him/her, firstly use their name and then ask a direct, personal and open ended question. If the OyA sinks back into conversation you have just saved yourself from a train wreck. Be careful to avoid whatever topic initiated that reaction and go for the close before they get distracted again. Swap phone numbers etc… leave them wanting more evoking the scarcity effect.

Hands:

Many of us know open hands is a good sign, potentially indicating honesty, but the more important cue for you is to watch out for hand signals that mean the OyA is thinking. Such signs include playing with the wine glass, reaching for something from a table or mantelpiece, playing with a lighter or match etc… these signs show contemplation and thought. This is your cue that you have hit on a topic that interests your target and is a sign to slow down, ask questions and allow room for thought and engagement.

Eyes:

For those of you who have already mastered the more obvious signs above, the tell tale sign to see if the OyA is interested in you or at least your topic of conversation is the size of their pupils. If and when they enlarge you are on to a winner, however if they shrink or worse still glance away quickly change topic and although all is not lost, do not put all your eggs in this basket!

Good luck with your next conversations with someone you like!

Aaron Allard Wins Big Brother 2011

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After nine weeks of watching the antics unfold in the Big Brother 2011 house, Friday saw the Big Brother finale with the four remaining housemates up for the title of Big Brother winner of 2011. Alex Rose Lee, Louise Cliffe, Jay McKray and Aaron Allard had all made it to Day 64 and now it was time for the final evictions from the Big Brother house.

Louise Cliffe was the first to be evicted. She wore a beautiful ruffled dress with sequinned corset and sported her new fringe haircut. During her interview with Brian Dowling, Louise spoke of her relationship with Jay, saying: “‘Nine weeks equals ten years in here. Jay is just so normal and he reminds me of the people I know back home.” She added enthusiatically, “I love him to bits I do, I do, I do.”

Louise Cliffe - the model housemate?

Alex Rose Lee, the last remaining female housemate, was the next to leave the Big Brother house. The fast food worker and ex air hostess was dressed in a short figure-hugging dress in her signature pink colour and it was no surprise that she was wearing her new Jimmy Choo shoes given to her as a birthday present from Jay & Louise. Alex had avoided the public vote every single week of the competition. Speaking to Brian, she said that being herself was what she thhinks got her through the show.

Alex left the house dressed in pink - no surprises there then!

The time had come for the winner of Big Brother 2011 to be announced. As Brian Dowling revealed it was Aaron Allard, the crowd erupted into a chorus of boos. Jay McKray was therefore in second place and exited the Big Brother house fighting back tears. He was always popular with the public having been saved from eviction in previous weeks. Jay confessed in his interview that he was in love with Louise and that she had kept him sane during the hard times he experienced in the Big Brother house. He went on to say that the hardest moment in the show was when there was only bananas to eat thanks to Harry’s food shopping prank and Jay said that he “will never eat a banana again.”

Jay McKray came second in the competition

And so it was time for Aaron Allard to leave the Big Brother house as the 2011 winner of the fly-on-the-wall reality TV show. Aaron had been up for eviction four times during Big Brother 2011 and had been saved by the public each time. It was thus a big surprise and a first in the history of Big Brother that on leaving the Big Brother house Aaron was welcomed by boos from the crowds outside rather than cheers. During his interview with Brian, he said that he had found the last 7 days difficult as he had missed Faye. He went on to say that he definitely wanted them to be a couple and that he “really liked her”. Aaron also said that he couldn’t understand why people had booed him.

Aaron Allard - the winner of Big Brother 2011

Perhaps it was his sulking that the crowds didn’t like? Or the on-off-on relationship he had with Faye Palmer? Or maybe it was just that this 30-something contract manager was more thoughtful and mature than the other housemates making him look patronising? Whatever the reasons behind the boos, Aaron Allard survived the nine weeks of scrutiny by the Big Brother cameras and some may say he also managed to survive the editing of the show where 24 hours is reduced to a few snippets of “good television”. Below are Aaron’s best bits from the show… enjoy!

Dating Statistics in the UK

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London Life Coach & Relationship Expert Sloan Sheridan-Williams talks about the UK dating scene. Follow Sloan Life Coach on Twitter @SloanSW_London and check out Sloan’s Life Coaching website www.sloansw.com

After a request from a client to know more about our current dating climate, I have collated the following information from research conducted by YouGov of just under 2500 people across Great Britain and other research I have sourced on dating statistics in the UK. So what does Britain’s dating environment look like?

Supposedly Britain’s dating community is currently 8.6 million strong, with singles spending a whopping £8 billion every year on searching for that special someone. 15 million people in the UK are currently estimated to be single, but only half of these are looking for a long-term relationship. Three quarters of singles have not had a relationship last beyond 2 years yet the current average age for a person to get married is 29 as opposed to 24 in 1851.

So if you are single it is suggested that the average cost of a date in Britain today stands at a whopping £200 including outfit and preparation. Men spend almost ten times as much on the actual date as women, however us females are said to spend nearly that on clothes and prep for the date.

London is still the most expensive area to date with Wales housing the keenest date hunters in UK. London contains 33 per cent more singles than any other county, but conversley it is considered the worst place to be single due to cost and competition.

42 per cent of singles are looking for love by the photocopier. Yet 52% think they are most likely to meet a potential date in a bar or club setting. Scots are more likely to stick to old fashioned methods of dating, spending just a quarter of the national average on unconventional dating. 15 per cent of daters in Britain want to find new ways to meet ‘the one’ and are bored with traditional methods.

However with technology becoming more a part of the dating scene, 43% of people have admited to Googling their first date before they meet them, with 4.7 million people in the UK having visited a dating website in the past year.

Not satisfied with just websites, the dating revolution has now come to the iphone and ipad, with applications like SmartDating, Facebook Dating, DNADating and Zoosk, to name but a few… have we perhaps gone  a bit too far? In just minutes on some of the apps, you can find someone within as little as a mile radius, that wants to meet you as soon as in the next 30 minutes. Although, it is brilliant that there is less stigma to dating sites than even just a few years ago, as it is now possible with the help of some of these apps to use the GPS on your device to show people where you are, be it your home or a Starbucks are we perhaps not taking dating too lightly?

I do wonder if technology is not superceeding the safety aspect once afforded to us by online dating. Just because a person is close by doesn’t make them right, all it takes is for them to walk by and try and find you which could be considered romantic if they turn out to be the much talked about ‘perfect partner’ but more often that not 5 minutes later you wonder what your iphone has got you into! Operator impulse control issues aside, geographical advancements in technology do add a nice twist on the dating theme but where will it end? For a faster ‘more effective’ or more accurately ‘quicker’ means of reaching out to someone on cyberspace should we really be comprimising our safety? That too, if it was that easy to find you, how do you know it isn’t that easy to cheat on you?

Unfortunately one-third of online dating users admit to lying in their profile, and that too about being in a relationship. It has even been suggested more actually lie than admit it. Despite this negative slant, one in five married individuals aged between 19 and 25 met their spouse online, which is the same number of people that marry a co-worker.

But before you get your hopes up for an office romance, be warned that half of all workplace romances are over within three months.

And on the topic of break ups, only 30% of relationships are ended face to face, although I only know of one instance (which was fictional – Sex in the City) where a character was crass enough to break up with a girl by Post-it note!

Dating is a mine field but whichever way you choose to go – old fashioned versus technology – a good match is no doubt not far from reach with the right outlook and perspective.

If you have any information you would like to add or further questions please do ask or leave a comment.

Please read here http://victoriaheartsreview.com/.

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William and Kate – Will They Last?

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London Life Coach & Relationship Expert Sloan Sheridan-Williams talks about Prince William and Kate Middleton giving her opinion on the likely success of their relationship ahead of the forthcoming Royal Wedding. Follow Sloan Life Coach on Twitter @SloanSW_London and check out Sloan’s Life Coaching website www.sloansw.com

Well a question no doubt on everyone’s lips is whether Wills and Kate are destined to be together. Many people wonder whether the temporary split is still a niggle between them or whether it is the foundation that will hold them together. When people are not pondering about this they are questioning whether Kate has what it takes to be part of the Royal family given her different background, but perhaps it is these differences that make this couple so special.

I think the official interview (courtesy of the Royal Channel) given by the couple as shown in this clip below is a good indicator as to the success of their relationship.

In the beginning of this interview, Prince William is asked about how he proposed. All in all he seems proud that he was romantic and the setting in Africa seems idealistic. It is interesting to note around 58 seconds into the clip, he purses his lips almost as if he is holding some information back. He then licks his lips which could be as simple as a comforter or could be because his mouth is dry which is one indicator that someone could be withholding information. At the end of the day, this couple should have some secrets and be allowed to not reveal everything so I would conclude that the proposal story is genuine and although a long time coming was actually perfectly timed for this happy couple.

It is interesting to note that William’s comforters increase when Kate is talking. For example, his hands touch each other more, at some stages actually rubbing his fingers. This is seen throughout the clip, a good example is just after a minute in but if you watch closely it is pretty constant. He is obviously no stranger to media questions so I would also hazard a guess it is because Kate is now being subjected to questioning, which she has not been accustomed to in such a way before.

The couple are however very natural at times, William more so. A good clip to see this is approximately 2:18 minutes in when he is talking about how he feels like a duck calm on the surface of the water but little feet paddling frantically beneath. William is full of genuine smiles, animated language and hand gestures. He continues to openly discuss his feelings and how it was difficult to hide the engagement which again seems genuine, his hand gestures are open and there are no signs of deception on his face. It appears he also kept quiet about the engagement to give Kate time to adapt and change her mind. Luckily she didn’t as they do seem like a potentially good couple, it is almost beautiful to watch as the interviewer proceeds in asking about children (approx. 4:18mins in) and Wills has a shy but excited smile and Kate’s face lights up with a full on nervous giggle to boot. It is a shame that this natural burst of emotion is quickly maintained by both parties and you see Kate very aware of the cameras again. This is not a criticism as no doubt it must be hard for her. You cannot choose who you love.

The interview continues on with a lot of hand comforters from William and a few mouth indicators from Kate showing at times a repressed desire to speak and at others a frustration and tension.

At 9:18mins in the interviewer has asked about the break up and you can see immediately Kate brushes her hair back, then you can see her physically relive some obviously very tough moments for her. Her lips turn down showing outwards signs of sadness and displeasure but she brings it back with a vocabulary that makes her appear like the strong woman that she will have to be to live in this media spotlight.

The couple no doubt have extra stress and strain from the press but when William talks about the relationship being fun (11:10mins) you see a genuine interaction and exchange between the couple which is no doubt how their friends see them

The interviewer then takes it to a point which I think a little unfair, but perhaps that is just life in the spotlight, when he mentions Diana and how Kate will live up to her memory. William quite obviously looks sad and it does not take an expert to see this. Kate on the receiving end of the question deflects it as best she can but her body language including nose flair, pursed lips, deep swallow and even a lick of her lips during the word intimidating tell a very different story. It seems an unfair question as no-one is asking Kate to be Diana but one that they both did well to recover from considering how difficult they found it.

Another potential unfair question (in my opinion) was when the reporter asked Kate how she felt about criticism. No doubt anyone would be lying if they said they were ok with horrendous rumours going around about them whether they are true or not, so it was no surprise to see deeper swallows (15.10mins onwards) with Kate looking down, lips turned downwards, and an outright deflection of the question. This reporter didn’t give up and repeats the question and Kate shows that she is already learning to deflect questions, she needs more practice in controlling her body language but I think that will come in time as her vocabulary although slightly stilted is very good at avoidance.

It is nice to see the couple return to a happier state at around 16:32mins in when they both have very genuine and animated reactions to the question about whether they are excited about the wedding. It is even sweeter to see Wills comfort Kate at 17:10mins by patting her on the knee while she is talking about learning the ropes and working hard at being his wife.

The interview finally ends as expected with relief from the couple that they survived.

I think this video showed Kate can handle the press, yes she needs work but it will come. It was a valiant effort; Will is obviously there to support her through it all. As a couple I think they will do wonderfully, although a quick brush up on controlling a few of their indicators from their experts and speech writers would probably hold them in good stead for the future as the media can be a tough forum to start out a marriage.

I wish them all the best and hope for sunshine on their happy day.

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